Who do I call first? Hubby or the doctor? Wait, do I *need* to call the doctor yet? Maybe I should pee on another stick... Oh man, this would make my due date...**calculates in head**...
LOL guys, I've been there! In a mere matter of seconds I had about a bazillion questions run through my head! If you're anything like me you want to know ALL the facts, ALL the info, what to expect, what to do, how to prepare, etc, and you want to know it all RIGHT NOW haha!! I've only been down this road once so far, but as a Type A personality, I can tell you what helped me navigate the unknown and ease my anxiety.
1. First up, I took a few extra tests, you know, just to make sure, LOL!! And in my opinion, the next step is to tell your husband so he can relish in that excitement with you! We had been trying so it wasn't a complete shock to us, BUT it was still so exciting that I ran straight from the bathroom back to my husband (who was sleeping in as it was the weekend) and whispered.."I'm Pregnant!!" I'll never forget that moment! Some people like to wait and tell their husbands with a cute outfit or a special card, or even capture the moment on camera, and if that's your thing, then girl, GO for it! I however, was too excited to hold it in, and I think sharing that raw fresh excitement with my husband just made it all the more magical.
2. Call your OB/GYN and schedule an appointment. Let them know you took an at home pregnancy test and it came back positive, and be ready to answer when they ask for the date of your last period (they'll specifically want to know the first day of your last period). Unless you're a high risk case, your OB will typically schedule you to come in around the 8 week mark. This first appointment is the longest. At this appointment you'll get a transvaginal ultrasound to confirm fetal heartbeat, you'll likely have some routine bloodwork done, your OB will ask for family medical histories from both you and your husband, and then of course they'll also document your weight, blood pressure, and have you pee in a cup. That's all pretty standard. In the meantime, the days and weeks between that first phone call and your first appointment seem like an ETERNITY!!
3. If you aren't already on a prenatal vitamin, get your hiney to the store like pronto and pick up a bottle. If you were trying to conceive, then odds are you're likely already taking a prenatal. However, if your pregnancy is a surprise then please know that starting a prenatal vitamin ASAP is one of the most important things you can do for both you AND your baby. If you have questions about which one to pick up, check with your OB.
4. Download a pregnancy app to your phone like yesterday, girlfriend! There's several out there, but my top two favorites are What To Expect (WTE) and Ovia. Each has it's pros and cons, and honestly I kept both LOL! Any app will ask for your last period as well so that it can calculate your due date for you.
**Just so you know, the magic formula is as follows: start on the first day of your last period, count backwards three months, then add 7 days. Voila! For Example: My last period was June 22, so counting back three months is March 22, add 7 days and my due date is March 29th!
The apps are helpful for sooo many reasons! First and foremost is the instant community of other women due the same month as you. You get information delivered to you based on your gestational age, which is super helpful. There's the fun "baby is the size of a ____" comparisons to look forward to each week. And of course helpful reminders to take your prenatal vitamin. Be sure to take full advantage of the message boards and forums in your app to help answer questions, concerns, etc. :)
5. Get to reading! As soon as we found out we were expecting, I immediately picked up a few books for us to read and man was that helpful! Hands down, my top recommendation is What To Expect When You're Expecting as it goes through every single detail. I still refer to it often! I also picked up The Natural Mama as I wanted some more natural remedies for various pregnancy related issues. For the hubby, I ordered Dude, You're Gonna Be A Dad and it's helped him relate to the pregnancy and various changes quite well. Plus it's fun to lay in bed together and read / learn all about some of the upcoming changes!
6. Decide when you're going to tell your parents (or close relatives) the exciting news, and when you'll announce publicly. Everyone is different and when you prefer to announce is entirely up to you. We initially decided we were going to wait until after our 8 week appt to tell our parents so we could make sure all was well, and then wait until 12 weeks to announce publicly. Only part of that worked out for us HAHA!! My brother and his fiance announced their pregnancy about two weeks before we planned to announce and in all the excitement I blurted out our news as well. Aside from that, we waited until 8 weeks to tell my husbands parents, and of course until 12 weeks to tell the rest of the world. Once you decide WHEN you want to make your announcements then you can get creative and have fun brainstorming ideas with your husband on HOW you want to break the news. Seriously, sharing that secret together is the coolest thing in the world and so hard, but so stinking amazing as well!
7. Reach out to a friend who has blazed the path before you! Preferably someone you can trust to keep your secret if you haven't gone public yet. I reached out to my three best friends (who've all coincidentally had children already) so I could have at least SOMEONE to talk to about everything and of course get all my million questions answered from a trusted source.
8. Join a due-date-specific Facebook group!! Thanks to the WTE app, I found a phenomenal Facebook group! Now, there are over 100k members in the app forum all expecting the same month as me, and countless private Facebook groups created by various members. I lucked out and joined one that happens to be smaller than most (around 170ish of us) and intimate. I've already made so many wonderful new mom friends, and have enjoyed going through this journey with each of them! It's been a true haven for me. It's a place you feel safe, understood, can vent, etc and hopefully, if you find the right group, then it's marked as a "secret" group meaning only those within the group can find it and see what goes on inside.
Whew! That's it! If my best friend hadn't already blazed this path for me, and she came to me for tips, this is exactly what I'd tell her to do as she starts out her journey into motherhood. Like I mentioned earlier, this may not be what calms your soul, but it certainly helped me! If you've read this far, thanks for hanging around! AND if you're reading this and you're expecting, then CONGRATULATIONS!!
XOXO!
